


How It's Supposed To Feel

by TrickstersBlessing (Rinielle)



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, First Kiss, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-26
Updated: 2019-07-26
Packaged: 2020-07-22 19:35:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19982209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rinielle/pseuds/TrickstersBlessing
Summary: When Beau is injured, she and Jester are cut off from the rest of the party until morning.





	How It's Supposed To Feel

The world shifted so suddenly back into focus, Beau felt disoriented. Her ears were ringing loudly and her head was pounding.

“Fjord!?” she heard Jester shout, followed by a cough. It was muffled. As though she were hearing her through a thick wall. 

“Nott!? Caleb? Caduceus?”

Beau gasped a breath, the feeling of it ripping through her throat, she ignored the pain; or rather she put it to the back of her mind. It wasn't helpful. Right now she needed oxygen. She needed to breath. She took another breath, and tried to blink through the blood running down her forehead into her eyes. Ahead of her, in the dim light, she could just make out the shape of Jester pacing. She was blurry, and getting more so by the second.

Beau felt a wave of dizziness.

“Jes?” she managed to rasp out, and just before the world went dark she saw Jester spin and heard her shout her name.

She came to an unknown amount of time later, to the gentle and comfortingly familiar sound of humming. Carefully she took a breath, then another deeper one, easier now than before. Slowly she opened her eyes, relieved to find her vision clear; although the tunnel was darker than it was before and there wasn’t a great deal to see.

She did see Jester. Arms wrapped around her knees, swaying slightly to the tune of her own humming.

She couldn’t see the others, but one of Caleb’s magic balls of light was still lingering in the air, so he at least must be okay, or conscious, anyway. Once upon a time she might have been surprised at the flood of relief that thought filled her with. No longer.

The globe was just barely illuminating the large wall of rock that now stood between her and Jester and the only known way out. Replaying it her head she could almost feel the heat of the blast, for once not caused by Nott or Jester, but her own stupid fault for insisting they give Nott a break checking for traps. She hadn’t seen the wire across the floor but she had felt it tug on her ankle. Eyes wide she’d spun on the spot ready to yell at the others to run for it when she’d been blasted off her feet backwards into a wall. Whatever happened next was unclear, a haze of pain and dizziness that has since dissipated. No doubt thanks to Jester. Though quite why Jester was even here with her was a mystery.

“Beau?” she blinked and found Jester sitting up a little straighter, what little of her face Beau could make out looked concerned. She shifted herself, using the wall to help pull herself up from where she’d been laid on the ground. Her muscles don’t exactly thank her, and she winced against the pain, but she managed. Beneath her, where her head had been, her hands found material and a glance down told her it was Jester’s cape. Carefully she pulled it out from under her.

“Are you okay?” she heard Jester ask, her voice higher than usual. Beau knew all to well how scared she must be to sound like that. It took all the strength she had but somehow she managed to push herself up onto her feet, cross the small distance across the tunnel to where Jester was sitting, ignoring her quiet “Don’t!” She lowered herself down to sit beside her, carefully folding up the cape and handing it over.

“I’m fine Jessie,” she said, cringing slightly as her voice came out even gruffer than usual.

“I could only manage one healing spell,” said Jester, sniffing slightly, “I did it as best I could but… you still looked really bad,”

“Well gee thanks,” Beau quipped, “You look great too,” she cringed again when Jester didn’t laugh.

  
“Sorry,” She said, “You did fine Jes, more than fine actually, amazing,”

Jester gave her a small smile but said nothing.

It was strange to sit in silence with Jester. When she wasn’t chattering about something amazing she’d seen or done or seen someone doing, she was usually singing or humming to herself as she had been before she realised Beau was awake. Even when she slept she made these, funny little snuffling noises and muttered to herself. Nonsense mostly, but on occasion Beau had heard her use one or other of the groups names, and once, very clearly, a little song about a catopus that had filled her with such fondness for the little blue tiefling she’d actually had to get up and go to the training room to punch something just to get it out of her system. Such a thing was starting to become something of a habit actually, but things had been so crazy since they’d left to run after Obann she’d not really had time to process what it might mean, never mind actually deal with it.

“The others…” she croaked out.

“They’re okay. Nott messaged me, Fjord and Caleb both caught some the blast, but Caduceus was able to heal them.” Jester replied, “But that sort of tapped him and… everyone else was also tapped so…”

“We’re stuck here til morning huh?” Jester nodded, fingers fiddling with the skirt of her new dress. It didn’t much look new anymore, torn in places and singed in others, as well as being half covered in ash and dust. 

It had probably been stupid. To go poking around in caves and tunnels on a volcano when they were already worn out from fighting Salamanders and another bloody Gods damned Dragon. They’d ended this encounter with a little more dignity and fewer near misses than the last time. On the other hand it might have been equally stupid trying to camp out on the side of said volcano given that apparently these Dust people weren’t particularly welcoming to unannounced company. They had tried to take shelter, not even intending to go far into the tunnel itself. Nott was drunk, more so even than usual but Beau wasn’t about to judge her for that. Dragons. Fuck them. So she’d gone ahead to check the tunnel out and now here they were.

She let her head fall back against the stone. “Fuck. I’m such a dick!” she groaned.

“What?” Jester replied, apparently appalled. 

“Yeah don’t worry guys I’ll check it out.” Beau said, exaggerating her own voice, “I’m supposed to be good at this shit. I even fuck up the stuff I’m good at.”

“Don’t say that Beau!” she felt Jester’s hand grab her own and looked down, already feeling a blush creeping up her neck. “You’re amazing, you just made a mistake. Everybody makes mistakes. How many traps has Nott set off before now?”

She had a point, but Beau wasn’t really concentrating on that right now. Jester was stroking her thumb gently over Beau’s wrist and she felt her mouth go dry in a way that couldn’t be good news. She chanced looking over at Jester’s face and wished she hadn’t. She was giving her that look of determined belief she often did when Beau was putting herself down, except now it wasn’t from across the room or a table, and there was nobody else around. It was just them, and she was right there. Just, firmly believing in Beau and refusing to let her do any differently.

“Yeah… I uh… guess,” she managed, already feeling like an idiot. She wasn’t forming sentences. This was definitely a problem. Possibly a bigger problem than she’d thought; even with the late night sparring trips. Jester smiled kindly at her before settling back, and Beau felt as though her heart did a funny little extra half beat. Jester’s hand stayed where it was.

“How uh…”  _ Come on Beauregard. Words. Connect them together. She’s your best friend you can do it.  _ “How’d you end up on my side of this mess any way? The blast should have knocked you back,”

Jester’s grip tightened slightly on her hand.

“Well you know I was sort of further back when it happened, Caleb and Fjord got hit and I was running to help them but then I saw you lying on the ground and rocks were starting to fall from the ceiling and I realised the roof was going to fall so…” she trailed off but Beau could guess the rest. She must have been knocked unconscious by the blast, but the cave in itself must not happened for a few seconds after. Jester must have run in to try and drag her out but not made it in time.

  
“I thought…” she watched Jester’s jaw clench slightly, a tear slid down her face, “When I got to you, you looked all cut up and… I thought I was too late and then… everything just started to fall in and I knew I wouldn’t get you back to the others so I just dragged you back out of the way,”

“That was all pretty reckless of you,”

Jester looked suddenly affronted, and Beau could have kicked herself because she withdrew her hand, instead folding her arms across her chest with a huff, as she had done many times when Fjord had dared to single her out as possibly not being okay by herself.

“I meant it as a compliment,” Beau said hastily, “I’m sorry. I’m bad at them. I guess I meant… it was pretty brave and… I’m glad you’re here. Fuck. Shit no. I don’t mean I’m glad you’re here, you shouldn’t be here. Neither of us should be… I just meant…” she paused, cutting herself off when she heard Jester snort out a little laugh beside her. “I meant,” Beau continued, “I’m glad if I have to be stuck here with anyone. That it’s you,”

“I’m glad I’m here too,” she heard her say a few moments later, more serious now, “You were really hurt Beau… I…” she felt her lay her head on her shoulder. The horns dug slightly into the side of her neck but she couldn’t really have cared much less.

“Thanks for saving me,” she said quietly.

“I’ll always save you Beau,” was the quiet reply, “Promise,”

“Even when I do miraculously stupid shit and nearly get myself killed?”

“Isn’t that just what always happens?”

“I guess,”

She felt Jester sigh and scoot even closer, their sides pressed against one another. 

“Yes. Even then,” she heard her say softly. 

A few seconds of silence passed, Jester’s breathing slowed and evened and Beau was sure she must have fallen asleep. Carefully, as carefully as she could without disturbing her, she turned her head enough that she could press a gentle kiss onto the top of her head. The angle was a little awkward and she ended up getting her horn more than her hair but the sentiment was there she supposed, and Jester wasn’t awake anyway.

“Love you Jessie,” she said as quiet as she could manage.

Jester shifted slightly and Beau cursed. Could she do anything right today? Could she be smooth just once in her life? Apparently not, because Jester was blinking up at her, a slightly sleepy and searching look in her eyes. Beau did what any woman head over heels for her best friend would do in that situation. She froze. 

A moment later Jester seemed to find what she was looking for, and she smiled. A bigger and brighter smile than Beau could remember seeing in a long time. She moved, slowly, but then there wasn’t much space to move anyway, and quite suddenly she was pressing a soft kiss to Beau’s lips, eyes never closing or leaving Beau’s until Beau’s brain kicked back into gear and she realised what was happening was, in fact, actually happening and leaned into the kiss. Jester’s eyelids finally fluttered closed, as they both lost themselves in the feeling of moving carefully, experimentally against one another. 

Jester drew back after a few seconds… minutes? Beau chased her for a moment, a new, more pleasant sort of ringing in her ears. She blinked her eyes open, forgetting when she closed them. Jester was fussing with her skirts again, looking contemplative.

“Huh,” she heard her say, watching her press fingers to her lips for a moment, “So that’s how it’s supposed to feel.”

Beau doesn’t know exactly what she means by that, she doesn’t want to ask. She’s scared to ask anything right now that might mean Jester won’t kiss her again when she slides a hand around one side of her neck drawing her back again. 

Jester does.


End file.
